What to Expect in Your First Therapy Session
Making the decision to start therapy can feel unfamiliar at first, especially if you’re not sure what to expect. Whether you’re feeling nervous, unsure, or just curious, know that you’re not alone. Many people feel a mix of emotions before their first session, and that’s completely normal. The good news is: your first therapy session is really just a chance to begin a conversation, with no pressure to have it all figured out.
What Typically Happens in a First Session
Your first session is a space for both you and the therapist to get a sense of whether working together feels like a good fit. You don’t have to dive straight into everything that’s going on. Instead, the therapist might gently explore things like:
What’s brought you to therapy at this time
Any current challenges or feelings you’re navigating
A bit about your personal history and background
What you hope to gain or explore through therapy
Any previous experiences with therapy (if relevant)
The session will also include some practicalities, including contracting together - during which you will go over confidentiality, how sessions are structured, and agreements about cancellations and fees. Most importantly, the first session is about creating a space where you can begin to feel comfortable, seen, and heard. You don’t need to come in with all the answers, it’s okay just to show up and be yourself.
How to Prepare for Your First Therapy Session
You don’t need to prepare extensively, but a little reflection can help you feel more grounded going in. Here are a few things you might find useful:
Think about what’s bringing you to therapy. Is there a particular issue on your mind? A feeling you want to understand? A pattern you’ve noticed?
Consider what you’re hoping for. You don’t need a detailed goal, but even having a sense of “I just want to feel less stuck” can be helpful.
Make a few notes if you would like. If you’re nervous about forgetting what you want to say, jotting down a few thoughts beforehand can ease the pressure
Be open, but set boundaries. You’re not expected to share everything right away. You’re allowed to pace yourself and only share what feels safe for you.
Questions You Might Want to Ask
Your first session is also a great opportunity to ask the therapist questions to help you feel more at ease or to see if their approach resonates with you. For example, you may want to ask:
✅ How would you describe your approach to therapy?
✅ What kind of experience do you have with the concerns I’m bringing?
✅ What does a typical session look like with you?
✅ How do you work with people who are feeling unsure or stuck?
✅ How often would you recommend sessions, and how long might we work together?
Remember, it’s a great thing to be curious, as this is a space that should feel collaborative, not one-sided.
If the First Therapist Isn’t the Right Fit - That’s Okay
Not every therapist will be the right match for you, and that’s completely normal. Like any relationship, the therapeutic one relies on connection, trust, and a sense of being understood. If something doesn’t quite feel right after the first two or three sessions, it’s okay to explore other options. It doesn’t mean therapy isn’t for you, it just means you haven’t found the right therapist for you yet. Sometimes, we’re taught to “stick things out” or feel bad for not clicking with someone, but when it comes to your mental health, you deserve a space where you feel safe and supported.
It’s perfectly okay to decide that a therapist isn’t the right fit for you. You won’t be offending them, therapists understand that the relationship needs to feel right for the work to be effective. If you’re finding it hard to end sessions because you feel guilty or unsure, that can actually be a valuable topic to explore in therapy itself. It might reveal something about how you navigate boundaries or put others’ needs before your own, and reflecting on that can be just as meaningful as the decision to move on.
Your first therapy session is simply the beginning of a journey toward greater understanding and self-awareness. It doesn’t have to be perfect or profound, it just needs to be honest. Trust your instincts, take it at your own pace, and know that you’re allowed to prioritise finding the right support for you. You’ve already done something great for yourself by considering therapy - giving it a shot with an open mind is the next step.
